


gay emails and tweets from Henry and alex

by Blepbean



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: Fluff, Inappropriate Humor, M/M, Multi, Post-Canon, literally just dumb tweets and emails that I made that Henry and Alex would probably write, stupid gay jokes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-06
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:14:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25747981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blepbean/pseuds/Blepbean
Summary: @aclaremontdiazME AND HENRY ARE GONNA HAVE SUCH GOOD SE12/25/20 12:03 AM@aclaremontdiazHenry here. Just pretend that everything you saw was just a dream. He’s currently passed out drunk on the bed.12/25/20 12:10 AM•        @beatriceofwalesOMFG IS HE OKAY12/25/20 12:43 AM
Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor
Comments: 20
Kudos: 138





	1. cottagecore and drunk Alex

**Author's Note:**

> that’s it, that’s all just gay emails and tweets that Henry and Alex writes, some poetry in there as well, might write multiple of these bc it’s so fun and quick to do dkdbdndn

**😫💦💦**

**———————————————————————**

A <agcd@eclare45.com>

11/21/20 2:32 AM

To dickdaddydom0922,

Big daddy dick 😫

Just got back from doing some meetings (that I didn’t want need to be there but June begged me to be there), pretty fucking shit and I hated it so much. There was a republican there HENRY, a REPUBLICAN. It was scary, but June and Nora was there and it got kinda heated.

(TLDR: We were like discussing plans about some political bullshit, he said some racist and homophobic shit, I almost punched him, but he just kicked out five minutes ago thanks to June)

Anyways, I’m writing this on my phone in a car while June is talking about how that old guys career is probably over, thank god. 

I’m way too tired for this bullshit, but Pez just messaged me a fun fact about you. I can’t believe you downloaded Grindr.

The thought of you showing just your chest with no face with the name _‘dicksaddydom0922’_ is soooo hot and sexy.

Love you,

xoxoxoxo 

P.S. Gordon Bowsher to Gilbert Bradley—1939

_... I lie awake all night waiting for the postman in the early morning, and then when he does not bring anything from you I just exist, a mass of nerves…_

  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: 😫💦💦**

**———————————————————————**

Henry <hwales@kensingtonemail.com>

11/21/20 3:12 AM

To Alex,

You fucking twat

I’m going to murder Pez. In my defence, first of all I was interested and curious. I had it for just a day when I was overseas with Pez. I almost had my first hookup with a random at 18! Think his username was like _‘freakyotter344’_ or something along those lines. But I quickly deleted it because everyone would’ve murdered me in the family, including Pez. 

(He did look cute though, I wonder what _‘freakerotter344’_ is currently doing at the moment)

Maybe, if I was just a random stranger and not a prince, I would have hooked up with him. Hell, I would be a pretentious gay writer writing shitty _‘call me by your name’_ rip offs (don’t get me on that novel with its predatory and pedophilia themes, though the writing was good), while hooking up with random strangers in Grindr.

Yours, 

dickdaddydom0922

P.S. You don’t get a bit here from a gay historical letter, because I hate you for bringing that up.

P.P.S. Fine, you get a excerpt from a historical gay email. 

Prince Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor to Alexander Gabriel Claremont-Diaz—2019

_“History, huh? Bet we could make some.”_

P.P.P.S. Please get back here in my apartment, I’m dying here. 

  
  
  
  
  


_@aclaremontdiaz_

_Henry is really clingy and romantic btw if anyone is wondering_

_11:23 -_ 11/23/20 

_@henryofwales_

_I’m not_

_12:22 - 10/23/20_

  * **_Henry is really clingy and romantic btw if anyone is wondering_**



_@aclaremontdiaz_

_This you?_

__

_13:11 - 11/23/20_

  * **_I’m not_**



  
  
  


_@henryofwales_

_I’m blocking you, we’re done._

_13:54 - 11/23/20_

  * **_This you?_**



  
  
  
  


**_Heyyyyyy_ **

**———————————————————————**

A <agcd@eclare45.com>

11/25/20 11:12 AM

Hi Henry! 

  
  
  
  


**_RE: Heyyyyyy_ **

**———————————————————————**

H<hwales@kensingtonemail.com>

11/25/20 11:13 AM

Hey Alex

  
  
  
  


**_RE: Heyyyyyy_ **

**———————————————————————**

A <agcd@eclare45.com>

10/30/20 11:14 AM

<3333333333333333

  
  
  
  


**_RE: Heyyyyyy_ **

**———————————————————————**

H <hwales@kensingtonemail.com>

10/30/20 11:14 AM

Love you too

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_:((_ **

**———————————————————————**

H <hwales@kensingtonemail.com>

11/30/20 1:23 AM

To A

Alex-Claremont-Diaz-you’re-too-fucking-away-from-me-again

I can’t sleep without you. I know you’re still tying up loose ends and you told me that you have to be at the whitehouse for a little bit. I know that. But I miss you, I really do. I’m writing this right now while I’m on the bed watching dumb rom-com’s on Netflix on my laptop. I don’t think I can sleep tonight, I drank coffee a while ago.

I know that I should be sleeping, my love. But I can’t. The thought of you being in the white house, much closer than before but still so far away, it’s making me restless. I want you in my arms, or in the bed. Did I ever tell you that sometimes when we’re sleeping, that when I wake up in the middle of the night, rolling over with my tired eyes, that I stare at you in such awe? I sometimes wonder that this is all just a cruel joke, that this is just a stupid dream. If it is, you’re suddenly disappearing in front of me, no longer a few inches away from me, that I can’t simply just reach out and lace your soft fingers against mine. You’re suddenly millions of miles away, the sea splitting us apart, my responsibilities taking me away from you. I’ll be back home at my room in England, closing my eyes and holding my breath to imagine you pinning me, feeling you’re hot breath against my lower earlobe 

Ok I’m bored and I can’t be bothered to finish this shit. I’m just getting to the good part where they confess and kiss in the rain. Miss you, come back here already, can’t wait till you go to start on your masters.

Love, 

Henry

A.K.A your local gay poet

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_@aclaremontdiaz_

_🥺🥺🥺_

11/30/20 3:32 AM

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_shut uppppppppp_

_11/30/20 4:21 AM_

  * _@henryofwales_



_Me and Henry literally carry this app, so no ❤️_

_11/30/20 6:32 AM_

  
  


  
  
  
  
  


_@aclaremontdiaz_

_Nora made me do a TikTok with her._

_11/31/20 12:32 PM_

  * _@noraishollering_



_You loved it!_

_11/31/20 1:21 PM_

  * _@henryofwales_



_didn’t even invite me?_

_11/31/20 4:22 PM_

  
  
  
  


**We should live in the woods (READ LATER KEEP WRITING ILY)**

**———————————————————————**

A <agcd@eclare45.com>

12/12/20 11:21 AM

To H,

The next author that will leave Shakespeare found dead TWICE 

Don’t even think about reading this yet. I didn’t shooo you away from the house and made you go on a disguise to go to a coffee shop for some inspiration just for you to read your emails. (But if you’re reading this just for a break, go away, this is for later, read a book or something for a break)

So I was thinking. What if we faked our own deaths? Mum and the queen will ride on our deaths for sympathy and ask for silence and support for the two of us from a car crash. No one knows who we are, we make a tiny cabin or a house in the woods. We will forever live there, drinking earl grey in the bed while reading books to each other while you write poems and stories, publishing under an anonymous name.

The thought of that amazes me.

So come back to me about this idea, think it over and really sit on it. Just texted Nora about it and replied back that it’s plausible. Get back to me babe. 

_From Alex,_

_Your bf_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: We should live in the woods (READ LATER KEEP WRITING ILY)**

**———————————————————————**

H <hwales@kensingtonemail.com>

12/12/20 3:21 PM

To A,

Alex

As much as I would loveeee to fake our own deaths, someone has to carry twitter and feed buzzfeed’s article writers about every tweet we write (they’re probably sick, or cry about every single one)

But I’m writing this email right now that in my last break before I finish the loose ends of some of my writings, maybe, in an alternate universe we do live like that.

And one of the excerpts that’s anonymously published is hoes something along like this

_“Love is a such a tricky thing, stupid and weird intricate thing that he can’t quite wrap his head around. He doesn’t understand why he’s suddenly ready to fall, to surrender himself and to fall apart into the crook of his neck, to take the leap of faith, to be so ready to wake up in their messy bed with the soft smells of cigarette and vanilla scented candles. Is this what love is? Is this what people call ‘love sick’, making him so blind that he’ll willingly do anything for some that he loves.”_

It’s still in its 1st draft though, what do you think?

Love, 

H

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: We should live in the woods (READ LATER KEEP WRITING ILY)**

**———————————————————————**

A <agcd@eclare45.com>

12/12/20 3:26 PM

I can’t fucking wait till it’s done.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_@aclaremontdiaz_

_ITS CHRISTMAS MERRY CHRISTMAS I LOVE YOU ALL DBZZIZXHZJZUH_

12/25/20 12:01 AM

_@aclaremontdiaz_

_CANT BELIEVE SANTA GAVE EBERYONE PRSENEVTS_

12/25/20 12:02 AM

_@aclaremontdiaz_

_OMG IM DRUNKKKKKKKKKKK IM SO DRUNK_

12/25/20 12:02 AM

_@aclaremontdiaz_

_ME AND HENRY ARE GONNA HAVE SUCH GOOD SE_

12/25/20 12:03 AM

_@aclaremontdiaz_

_Henry here. Just pretend that everything you saw was just a dream. He’s currently passed out drunk on the bed._

12/25/20 12:10 AM

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_OMFG IS HE OKAY_

_12/25/20 12:43 AM_

@ _henryofwales_

_can’t believe I have to take care of a baby, but this is probably one of the best Christmas that I’ve had._

_12/25/20 1:21 AM_

  * _@noraishollering_



_send pics, I wanna torture him in the group chat when he wakes up4_

_12/25/20 1:32 AM_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_@aclaremontdiaz_

_I'm so sorry for ever sending that tweet, but if I could take that back, I would. I would like to apologise for my reckless behaviour, but in my excuse I was heavily intoxicated but also really horny._

_12/25/20 11:12 AM_

  * _@henryofwales_



_we were doing so well babe…._

_12/25/20 1:21 PM_

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_ALEX DJSBSJSHD_

_12/25/20 2:21 PM_

  * _@jclaremontdiaz_



_Apology accepted king 😔✊ we all make mistakes_

_12/25/20 2:32 PM_

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. happy holidays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah <3 this is going to be one of those fics that isnt updated a lot so

_ @henryofwales _

_ alex can’t use twitter anymore lmao they made him delete it. merry christmas btw _

_ 12/25/20 7:32 PM _

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_ sending him my thoughts and prayers 🙏 _

_ 12/25/20 7:56 PM _

  * _@jclaremontdiaz_



_ yeah mums soo missed  _

_ 12/25/20 8:12 PM _

  * _@pezokonjo_



_ @beatriceofwales sending my prayers too 🙏 _

_ 12/25/20 9:02 PM _

  * _@noraishollering_



_ f  _

_ 12/25/20 11:32 PM _

  
  
  
  
  
  


_ @pezokonjo _

__

_ 12/26/20 2:22 AM _

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_ what are you manifesting? _

_ 12/26/20 6:32 AM _

  * _@pezokonjo_



_ @beatriceofwales for the super six to get a podcast, we need to make a podcast and post it on twitter i’m the least regulated out of all of u they’ll allow it _

_ 12/26/20 8:02 AM _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**dear beautiful boyfriend**

**———————————————————————**

A < [ agcd@eclare45.com ](mailto:agcd@eclare45.com) >

12//27/20 10:32 AM

To Henry,

My beautiful boyfriend that I’ve ever laid my eyes upon

Can I use your twitter to just scroll I’m dying

From Alex,

xoxoxoxox

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: dear beautiful boyfriend**

**———————————————————————**

H < [ hwales@kensingtonemail.com ](mailto:hwales@kensingtonemail.com) >

12//27/20 11:22 AM

To Alex,

You dumbass

No, go away.

Sincerely, 

Henry, who had to clean up your puke.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: dear beautiful boyfriend**

**———————————————————————**

A < [ agcd@eclare45.com ](mailto:agcd@eclare45.com) >

12//27/20 11:23 AM

You suck

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**NEW YEAR PLANS**

**———————————————————————**

A < [ agcd@eclare45.com ](mailto:agcd@eclare45.com) >

12/28/20 3:21 PM

To Henry, 

H

Hey. You haven’t forgotten about the New Year plans right? Mum’s setting up a party at the White House, like this whole celebration about how she makes a speech on how grateful she is that she’s elected. But… June’s making plans about how we can just have our own tiny little party, something chill.

Lemme know if you’re interested, cause after all this weird bullshit I kinda want a smaller party where we just go over at someone’s place and eat and drink. We can make some excuses about how we can’t be there for the White House, like how we wanted to celebrate smalle. Can Bea come? Or Pez? Nora and June are already planning the whole thing.

Get back to me.

Love, 

Alex.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**RE: NEW YEAR PLANS**

**———————————————————————**

H < [ hwales@kensingtonemail.com ](mailto:hwales@kensingtonemail.com) >

12/28/20 8:46 PM

To Alex.

A

I don’t know, maybe? Sorry that I’m not there at the apartment, I’m stuck at the building finalising plans with Pez. I’m sore. My neck hurts. I feel kinda dizzy at the moment but it’s worthed. These kids need these

homes, I don’t know. I just feel so angry but also annoyed at myself that I will never experience this and like feel like I should be doing more? That I’m not doing enough. These kids, they deserve so much more, they don’t deserve to be like this.

Fuck I’m crying, sorry. Pez will be there. Bea will be there too. I got to go, I’ll get home late. 

Love, 

H.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ @henryofwales _

_ I know that this might sound so pretentious but I’ve just realised how privileged I am? I may be gay but I’ve never been kicked out for who I am, I have a whole apartment and so much money, and I feel like I could do more than just build a few houses. _

_ 12/28/20 9:06 PM _

  * _@henryofwales_



_ I am so lucky to have never been kicked out for being who I am. I am so privileged and if anyone who is reading this is going through something that I’ve tweeted just now that you’re valid, fuck them, alright? You’re my Dad now. I don’t make the rules _

_ 12/28/20 9:07 PM _

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_ You’re already doing so much. Henry, Alex just texted me about how worried he is. Take a break, go home early ❤️ _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**i love you so much**

**———————————————————————**

A < [ agcd@eclare45.com ](mailto:agcd@eclare45.com) >

12/29/20 2:32 AM

dear henry

my love

i’m writing this so you have something to wake up to. i know who you are, you are so kind and passionate and caring, alright? you’re giving away so much of yourself because you’ve just noticed how much you have, but slow down, let me be there with you. take care of yourself, you’re giving away too much of yourself. you are so emotional and sweet, and you so care about everyone that you’re working with. i know that you think that you’re not doing enough but you are, kids, teenagers, people seeing themselves, being represented by you, a FUCKING PRINCE. 

so don’t ever doubt yourself or beat yourself up, okay? cause i’m going to go and kill you myself,

yrs

A

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ @henryofwales _

12/29/20 10:11 AM

  
  
  
  
  
  


_ @henryofwales _

_ I’m gonna cry  _

_ 12/29/20 10:17 AM _

  * _@pezokonjo_



_ You good? _

_ 12/29/20 10:32 AM _

  * _@henryofwales_



_ @pezokonjo im fine just thinking about how lucky i am atm _

_ 12/29/20 10:33 AM _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ @henryofwales _

_ HAPPY NEW YEAR!  _

_ _

_ 1/1/2021 12:00 AM _

_ @henryofwales _

_ I’m just so weirded out that its already the next year and idk but im so grateful for all of the things that has happened to me and i cant wait for the next year _

_ 1/1/2021 12:33 AM _

  * _@beatriceofwales_



_ <33333333333 _

_ 1/1/2021 12:45 AM _

  * _@jclaremontdiaz_



_ Everyones gonna be so shocked for what I have planned wink wink _

_ 1/1/2021 12:53 _

  * _@pezokonjo_



_ Awwww  _

_ 1/1/2021 1:23 AM _

  * _@noraishollering_



_ @jclaremontdiaz theyre not ready for it  _

_ 1/1/2021 1:32 AM _

  
  


_ @henryofwales _

_ Reminder that pez is the least regulated out of us so do whatever you want from that info _

_ 1/1/2021 1:43 AM _

_ @pezokonjo _

_ Ok my job is to regulate the night so stayed tuned yall _

_ 1/1/2021 2:11 AM _

_ @pezkonjo _

_ Bea is convincing alex and henry to adopt a cat or a dog atm and i think shes had a bit too much to drink _

_ 1/1/2021 2:19 AM _

_ @pezkonjo _

_ Yall are so cute omfg _

_ 1/1/2021 2:29 AM _

_ @pezkonjo _

_ Guys henry and alex are breaking up  _ __ 😔 😔 

_ 1/1/2021 3:09 AM _

  * _@henryofwales_



_ Not my fault he doesnt like LOK _

_ 1/1/2021 3:21 AM _

  * _@noraishollering_



_ f _

_ 1/1/2021 3:44 AM _

  * _@jclaremontdiaz_



_ I'm disowning him _

_ 1/1/2021 3:59 AM _

_ @henryofwales _

_ I hate men but tonight I just think that men <3 _

_ 1/1/2021 4:09 AM _

  * _@noraishollering_



_ Women <3 _

_ 1/1/2021 4:11 AM _

  * _@jclaremontdiaz_



_ Mlm and wlw solidarity post straight people dont interact _

_ 1/1/2021 4:23 AM _

_ @pezokonjo _

_ Alex here im gonna make this quick ill delete this in like ten seconds but @henryofwales i love you so much and i thi _

_ 1/1/2021 4:43 AM _

  * _@noraishollering_



_ Top ten photos taken before an incident  _

_ 1/1/2021 4:53AM _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
